8 Things Servers Wish We'd Stop Doing

Dining out is supposed to be one of life's easier assignments. We sit down, someone brings us food, and we don't even have to wash the dishes afterward.

Still, it turns out some of the things we do at restaurants, often because we're genuinely trying to help, can make our server's job harder. So, before we proudly stack another tower of dirty plates, here are eight things servers probably wish we'd stop doing.

1. Stuffing Everything Into Our Glass

The drink is gone, and suddenly that empty glass starts looking like a perfectly good little trash can. In goes the napkin, straw wrapper, lemon wedge, and perhaps a few other casualties on the table.

But, servers say this can make clearing the table messier. The napkins get soggy, the utensils can make the glasses top-heavy, and somebody eventually has to get everything back out.

It’s perfectly acceptable to let the glass serve its original purpose.

2. Helping Ourselves to the Server's Tray

Our drink is right there. Surely, grabbing it would be helpful? Not quite. 

Removing something from a tray can change its balance, potentially sending everyone else's drinks somewhere they were never meant to go. Our intentions were lovely, but our hands should remain firmly in our laps.

3. Trying to Get Their Attention Like We're Hailing a Taxi

We need ketchup. Our water is empty. The check appears to have entered another dimension. Wanting to get our server's attention is perfectly reasonable, but raising our hands or shouting across the restaurant isn't. 

Instead, eye contact or a small raised hand should do the trick. No air-traffic-control signals required.

4. Rearranging the Table Without Asking

We need another chair, and there's one sitting three feet away. Easy enough, right? Not necessarily. 

Restaurants arrange tables around reservations, server sections, walkways, and the number of guests they're expecting. If we need more room, it’s best to ask. The staff may happily rearrange things for us. They'd just like to be included in the architectural design.

5. Making a Reservation and Then Ghosting Them

Plans change. It happens. But, if we make a reservation and can't go, forgetting to cancel can leave the restaurant with a table that could have gone to somebody else.

Nobody needs our life story. A quick call will do.

6. Building a Tower of Dirty Plates

This one hurts. Some of us have spent years stacking our plates after dinner, quietly congratulating ourselves for being so considerate.

Unfortunately, stacking dirty plates can interfere with the way servers prefer to clear a table. A wobbly pile can also make everything harder to carry.

Not every server hates plate stacking, of course. But, unless we know what we're doing, perhaps we can retire from bussing duty for the evening. We tried.

7. Waiting Until the End to Ask for Separate Checks

Wanting separate checks isn't the problem. Waiting until we've finished dinner to mention it is.

If everyone’s paying separately, telling our server ahead of time makes it easier for them to keep track of who ordered what.

That's particularly helpful after shared appetizers, several rounds of drinks, and the sudden realization that nobody remembers who ordered the truffle fries.

It’s helpful to give servers a heads-up before the accounting portion of the evening.

8. Forgetting That Closing Time Is a Real Time

Nobody expects us to abandon dessert mid-bite when closing time arrives. But, there's a difference between finishing dinner and settling in for another hour while the restaurant slowly shuts down.

If the dining room is empty, the music has stopped, and chairs are beginning their nightly journey onto the tables, the staff might be trying to tell us something. Of course, we don't need to sprint for the door.

But, we probably shouldn't order another coffee, either.

Tonight, We're Off Duty

The funny thing is that several of these habits start with good intentions. We're trying to tidy the table, grab our own drink, or save somebody a little bit of work.

But, servers already know how to carry trays, clear tables, and keep a dining room running.

Our assignment is much simpler. All we have to do is be nice, speak up when we need something, enjoy our meals, and keep our napkins out of the water glass.

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